Publish at Calameo
And I am including a few pictures I took from last week when I went canoeing. No particular reason for that really, I just wanted to share them. I mean what's not to like about nature? fresh air and singing birds. Swimming in the water and a little picknick on the shore. Oh my! Eating cherries while black flies fly around my ankles biting me gently. Mosquitos hovering around nibbling me, because you know, I am like cake to them. And who doesn't like it when a mosquito inexplicably flies deep into your ear and seemingly dies there. Suicide by ear, and leaving my mind mildly irritated all day because I suspect.. no I know there is a dead mosquito inside my ear and there are probably eggs in it or something. A family of Mosquitos soon to be living inside my ear canal coming out like a squadron of planes at night while I am sleeping, then biting my bottom endlessly.
Oh and lets not forget the horsefly who flew around my head for an hour making me flail around like an idiot. There is no question that horse flies are the assholes of the forest. And if they do end up biting you then you know it because they don't mess around. They take a big freaking bite. I managed to hit him once during my flailing and even the size of them is obnoxious. They have far too much weight and substance for a biting bug.. you really feel their bulk when you hit them with your hand while swinging blindly yet hopefully, and its disconcerting. I prefer to feel like a God when I splat my bugs, but with horseflies they just kind of change their course a bit when you hit them. They shake their little heads then come back to circle you again. Jerks. With mosquitos I like to chastise them after I get them. I like to say things like "You see what happens when you bite me Mr Mosquito? You are now flat and dead. Think about that and tell your friends" Actually I shouldn't say Mr Mosquito as that would be incorrect, all biting mosquitos are female. The males eat... nectar. But with a Horsefly I have nothing to say. Nothing resolved because I don't think I have ever defeated one, and I am pretty sure they all know that too and don't really take me seriously. But the good thing was the wind picked up and blew them all away to make for a wonderful trip.